Author: Michael Brown

Dear NPR–Look No Further, I’m Your Man!

radio_microphone.jpgDear Anonymous National Public Radio (NPR) employee,

Thank you for stopping by Ocular Fusion at 1:49:04 PM on Thursday, June 1, 2006. I noticed that you didn’t reach my blog via a referring link such as a search engine or another blog. That probably means that you either had my site bookmarked or perhaps emailed to you by one of the many talent scouts whom you’ve no doubt commissioned to scour the highways, byways and backwoods of America for fresh, emerging commentators and writers such as yours truly.

I’ll try to overlook the fact that you didn’t browse through any of my posts and that my stat counter indicated that you stayed approximately “0 seconds” before moving on.… Read the rest

The Road From Malibu to Searcy Runs Through Birmingham

Pepperdine.jpgI didn’t graduate from Pepperdine University. In fact, I’ve never set foot on the beautiful Malibu campus nestled by the jagged shoreline of the Pacific Ocean. But thanks to our youth minister, Jason, who recently attended the annual lectureship there, I am the proud owner of a bright orange Pepperdine t-shirt with arched, blue letters and a school seal with motto that reads “Freely ye received, freely give.” It was the first shirt that I pulled out of my drawer last Friday as I prepared to travel to Ozark, Alabama to spend Memorial Day weekend with my younger sister and her family.… Read the rest

It’s a Long Way From Gotham to Huntville

AL_12131.gifLast year at this time, the Eyegang was in New York City celebrating a 20th wedding anniversary with a family vacation. This year, things are more down to earth–hanging out with my little sis and her family in the roaring metropolis of Ozark, Alabama, the “Best Kept Secret” in the South. It’s a long way from Gotham to LA (Lower Alabama), but we expect the fun, fellowship and food (barbeque and shrimp boil are on the menu) to be every bit as satisfying.

While in New York City we walked till our little dogs howled for mercy trying to take in as much as we could in our 4 days–Ground Zero, The Statue of Liberty, baseball at Yankee Stadium, a Broadway play, etc.… Read the rest

Ole, Ole, Ole…Oh No!

field shot.JPGSeveral of us made a mad dash north on I-65 last night to Nashville to watch the U.S. Men’s National Soccer Team take on the Moroccan National Team in the first of a series of “send-off” matches leading up to the World Cup in June. We were part of “history” according to the PA announcer–26,141 flag-draped, red, white and blue-painted, “USA, USA”–chanting soccer fanatics in Titan Coliseum–the largest crowd to ever watch a soccer match in the state of Tennessee. Actually that’s not quite correct since the happy throng also included about 10,000 or so red and green clad Moroccan fans who swayed and chanted to the steady beat of a well-stocked percussion section.… Read the rest

The Da Vinci Nap–A Review (Sort of)

Da-Vinci-Man.jpgI wasn’t going to go see that movie this past weekend. I’m just not a bandwagon kind of guy. I’ve studied a little (well, actually a lot) of church history on my own, and when I read the book a couple of years ago, I laughed out loud at the bogus story line.

But then through a weird set of circumstances, I came about two free tickets, so off Eyegal and I went to follow the herd. I figured that it must have been God’s will.

But here’s the truth: I fell asleep. Not once, but twice (I think Eyegal might have punched me the second time thinking that I was about to snore).… Read the rest

Thinking Like a Child, Clanging Like a Cymbal

“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.”–I Corinthians 12:11

Or at least that’s the way it’s supposed to work.

In my series “Blogging–The Wonder Years” which will resume later this week, it’s been pretty apparent from my 7th grade journal that my thought processes have undergone a little evolution since the 1970s. I fancy myself a more grown-up thinker these days. But the truth is I’m still a work-in-progress, and if God grants more time, I’ll probably look back in twenty years and have a good laugh at some of my early 21st century pontifications and ponderings.… Read the rest

Search Me!

pat down.jpgI’m really not begging for a pat-down or anything like that. It’s just that folks who Googled a topic like “Huntsville High prank” or “Nancy Grace and Churches of Christ” are being caught up in the “rapture” and transported from my old site to Ocular Fusion 2.0.

If you’re one of those chosen ones, then rest assured that the article that you’re looking for is here. You can always use the “Search” function located at the bottom of the sidebar if need be, or just click the links above.

I’ve noticed that many are coming here looking for pictures of the Northwestern University women’s soccer team’s hazing party.… Read the rest

Ocular Fusion 2.0–I’ll Be Watching You

the-all-seeing-eye_1_-217x240.jpgWhoa, what just happened you ask? Through the magic of a small piece of HTML-code strategically placed in my old site, you’ve been caught up and whisked away to Ocular Fusion 2.0 (www.ocularfusion.net). Talk about your raptures. Or would that be an alien abduction?

Anyway, now that you’re here stick around and, as we say in the South, “sit a spell.” I’ve still got some tweaking to do, but the bulk of the renovation is complete. Unlike my desk at work, the new site is clean, uncluttered and easy to navigate. No more depressing black either. I’ve decided (with fashion imput from my color consultant Scott) that brighter and cheerier colors are in order, the better to reflect my, uh, sanguine personality.… Read the rest

Grrrrrr! Lady Tigers Win State!

IMG_0321.jpgThe “thrill of victory and the agony of de feet” were everywhere apparent at this year’s 2006 Alabama State Soccer Championships this past weekend in Huntsville. Dreams were made and shattered as match after match was decided in sudden-death “golden goal” overtime or kicks from the mark. The biggest thrill was watching the Lady Tigers from Number One son’s Grissom High School take home their first blue trophy since 1999 in a thrilling 2-1 victory over arch-rival Oak Mountain. The game was dead-even at 1-1 after regulation and two hard-fought overtime periods and eventually was decided by kicks from the mark (more on that in a moment).… Read the rest

A Beautiful Day for the Beautiful Game

This morning Number Three Son and I will head over to the John Hunt Soccer Complex for the opening matches of the Alabama State Soccer Championships. Huntsville has the best soccer complex in the state and has hosted the championships since 2001. This is an annual tradition for Number Three and me. He serves as a ball boy–excuse me, ball handler–and I volunteer to be a team host. As a host I work with a couple of visiting teams just making sure that they’re comfortable, find their way around and have everything they need to compete successfully.

What’s in it for me?… Read the rest

Googlezon–It Begins

The assimilation has begun. Resistance is futile.

Although it wasn’t supposed to happen until 2008, I have evidence that Google and Amazon have already joined forces to create Googlezon, a platform combining Google’s superb seach engine technology with Amazon’s “social recommendation engine” and “huge commercial infrastructure.” Here’s the story:

On Tuesday, I had one of my “40-something” brain lock moments at the office. I had a patient in the chair with early macular degeneration for whom I planned to prescribe Ocuvite eye vitamins. The only problem was I couldn’t for the life of me remember the dosage.

So I turned to my computer and while explaining the reason for the vitamins to the patient, quickly typed “Ocuvite” into Google and found the website, which of course provided me with the proper dosage–all in a matter of seconds.… Read the rest

Let’s Play GOD!

I’ll admit that I’m not much of a video-gamer. My idea of a good video game involves running from ghosts or defending the earth from marauding space invaders. Besides, the reflexes aren’t what they used to be, so I leave the video games to the three young bucks in my house. But I can still hold my own and beat them in ping-pong (and probably in PONG as well). Ok, I’ll admit that Number Three did beat me the other night, but that was only because I wasn’t wearing my sweatbands.

I bring all this up to introduce a forthcoming video game currently evolving under the direction of the creator of The Sims, Will Wright.… Read the rest

Fast Times at Huntsville High

It’s not every day that national news occurs in Huntsville, Alabama. But in the case of this particular story, we denizens of the “Rocket City” would have preferred to keep a lower profile.

Last Thursday, several seniors at Huntsville High School suffered from simultaneous group brain lock and decided that they would salve their senioritis and seal their legacy with the “greatest senior prank of all time.” Their idea? Lure a mentally ill homeless man into the school with promises of food and money and have him take off his pants and streak down the halls in the middle of a class change.… Read the rest