Category: College Football

Cognitive Dissonance, Or, OMG, Sarah Palin Wears Houndstooth!

Cognitive dissonance. For me, it could be simply defined like this:

palin-hounstooth.jpg

(A tip o’ my houndstooth fedora to DU for contributing to my *cough* “research” into the true nature of Sarah Palin’s refractive error)

Steady, Mike, steady…

No wonder Palin/McCain has a 24 point lead in Alabama. Then again, it could be just all the conservatives who live here. After all, everybody knows a “true conservative” would never support Obama.

Well, on to The Game. I just want my loyal Arkansas readers to know that I love you. I really do. But here’s the plain, unvarnished truth: If Bama brings their A-game, it could get ugly quick (ask Clemson).… Read the rest

R, Rol, Roll, T, Ti,Tii…Oh, Never Mind!

You know me, I always come back from T-town with a story or two.

There were so many Auburn fans in Tuscaloosa last Saturday you’d have thought it was Iron Bowl weekend. They were driving around with their orange and blue flags, holding up their very premature 7-finger salute, and generally hootin’ and hollerin’ like it was feeding time down at the ol’ trough. Since they were playing the Bulldogs in Starkville and had a 6:00 pm start time as well, they were passing through around lunchtime on their way to their game. And what a game that turned out to be!… Read the rest

Good Tidings

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You never know whether Good Bama or Bad Bama is going to show up for a game. We lucked out Saturday night as we watched Good Bama, who had been on vacation against Tulane last week, thrash Western Kentucky 41-7 from our nosebleed seats atop the north end zone. We learned that if you just close your eyes and think cool thoughts, it feels just like you’re sitting in one of those fancy-pants air-conditioned skyboxes.

We saw lots of Tide touchdowns from a very balanced run/pass attack (freshman running back Mark Ingram, by the way, is the real deal), and the lone Hilltopper touchdown was the first scored on the defense this year.… Read the rest

Hairy Mascots and Hurricanes

I’ll be headed down to T-town with Number Three Son tomorrow to watch the Crimson Tide take on the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers. My parents-in-law lived in Bowling Green, KY from 1997-2004, so I had the opportunity to watch WKU play many different sports over the years, and I even saw one of their football playoff games in 2002, the year they won the I-AA national championship. It’ll be interesting to see what kind of progress they’re making as they continue the transition to big boy ball.

I’m all for progress as long as it’s not at the Crimson Tide’s expense. It shouldn’t be that close, but with our still relatively young crew, you never know.… Read the rest

Northern On My Mind

Call me crazy, but for some reason I’m overcome with the urge this morning to dress in plaid, let my beard grow out a bit more, finally make that pilgrimage to Moosefest and watch old episodes of one of my all time favorite TV shows, Northern Exposure.

Speaking of which, here are a few soothing scenes from Wassila Cicely, Alaska.

As we enter into this season of college football and all-out culture war, maybe Alabama and Auburn fans, yea, even Republicans and Democrats can agree on one thing:

Dancing with your honey is a good thing.

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… Read the rest

Tarheels Launch Preemptive Invasion Against Duke

Concerned over rumors of a resurgence in Duke University football and the potential loss of the coveted Carlyle Cup, the UNC Tarheels launched a preemptive strike against the Blue Devils this past Saturday.

“Operation Eat Mor Chikin” began just prior to the kickoff of the Blue Devils home opener when two UNC paratroopers landed on the field at Wallace Wade stadium shouting “Mission Accomplished!” as soon as their boots touched the ground. That mission was to kidnap new Duke Head Coach and offensive mastermind David Cutcliffe and to commandeer his WMTs (Weapons of Mass Touchdowns).cutcliffe.jpg

The operation went awry, however, when the twelve Duke students who actually showed up to watch the game and the lone Blue Devil security guard, Barney Fife III, chased the interlopers from the field.… Read the rest

Up Klose and Persun-uhl with Mike The Redneck

It was a Faustian bargain if there ever was one. The deal was that I could blog about the Olympics to my heart’s content if I would then feature a one-on-one interview with everybody’s favorite itty-bitty Bama fan, Mike the Redneck, who was about to bust his little beer gut to talk about the start of the college football season.

So yesterday the two of us sat down for a little Tuscaloosa tête-à-tête, and here’s what transpired:

MTEG: Well, look what the polecat just drug in! If it isn’t Mike the Redneck!

MTRN: Thahutt’s kute. Nice to see you too, Eyeball boy.… Read the rest

Pardon the Interruption; Football’s A’Comin’!

We interrupt our normal Olympic programming to bring you the following important S.E.C. football announcements.

First off, welcome Clemson fans! It seems some literature-loving Tiger (did you know there was such a species?) has linked my post entitled “The Greatest Alabama Fan in the World” to a fan message board and now orange and blue purple (h/t, Number One) Tigers of a different stripe are coming here in droves.

I hope y’all enjoyed the story. Phyllis from Mulga? Ha! She ain’t got nothin’ on Amanda! And believe me, there’s plenty more like that where she came from. It’s going to be LOUD in Hotlanta come 8/30, folks!… Read the rest

The 12th Man

Number One Son road-tripped to Auburn this past weekend to visit with some friends and to watch the Bama v. Auburn basketball game. The visit with friends went well. The game? Not so much.

Yesterday morning, Number One was driving to church when he stopped at an intersection with a crosswalk. He looked both ways, halfway expecting a herd of cattle to come ambling by about that time. Instead a lone figure in a suit was walking down the sidewalk to his right and starting into the intersection.

Number One stayed stopped and yielded like he was supposed to. He looked down to fiddle with something in the car, and when he looked back up, the man in the suit was directly in front of him and staring straight at him.… Read the rest

Ro Ride, Ro!

A Monday morning mental health break is in order after a week of edgy, political blogging and a weekend of sad news–that’s the way Meg would have wanted it. Behold, Amazing Gracie the Wonderdog:

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I told you she was Bama Beautiful in that houndstooth collar of hers!

Gracie is shown here firing up a victory stogy after the Tide’s 41-17 thrashing of the Vols last October. Little did she know that would be her last one for the season.

Like many a Bama fan, Gracie was disappointed in our anemic offense and poor quarterback play, and she didn’t touch her food for days after that loss to Lo-Mo.… Read the rest

A Hot Time In T-town

It looks like it’s going to be a hot time in T-town tomorrow night.

A few minutes ago, I received this email from the University of Alabama Athletic Department:

Dear Crimson Tide Fan:

As we approach the home stretch of our 2007 home football schedule, I want to thank each of you for your support throughout this season, both at Bryant-Denny and at the away venues. You have helped make a difference for Coach Nick Saban and the Crimson Tide football team, and all of us at the University are appreciative of your contribution each and every Saturday.

Certainly, this weekend’s game presents a challenge not only to our team and coaches but to our game management personnel as well.

… Read the rest

Now That’s Trickeration

I was in Jackson, Mississippi with Number Three Son on Saturday attending The Crossroads of the South Invitational sponsored by The Jackson Futbol Club. Kudos to the club and the city for putting on one of the best tournaments we’ve ever attended.

Number Three’s U-15 United squad played very well, winning their bracket by defeating a Chicago Fire junior team 3-1. Despite carrying the field in both possession and shots on goal in the semifinal, we fell 1-0 off a free kick from 35 yards out (one of only 3 shots on goal our opponents had all afternoon) that slipped past our keeper’s fingers and just under the crossbar.… Read the rest

Uh, Hey Vols

Uh, hey Vols. Uh, hey Vols. Uh, hey Vols.

We just beat the, well, you know, crap out of you.

Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, give’em, well, you know, heck Alabama!

Roll Tide, Roll!

UPDATE 10/22: For those of you from other parts of the country and world who may be unsure of what I’m talking about, here’s the Full Monty version of the “Rammer Jammer” from field level. This is what it sounded like to Phil Fulmer.

Take a good listen, Tommy–you’re next.

… Read the rest

Eventually Saban Provides National Title

With the resurging Tide catapulting back into the Top 25 for the first time since 2005, ESPN College Gameday will be broadcasting live from Tuscaloosa tomorrow morning. That should give Number One Son a good reason to roll out of the sack long before his usual Saturday wake-up time of twelve noon. It’s my understanding that many will be camping out tonight in the hopes of getting some face time with Chris, Corso and Herbie, but Number One says he will not be among them. As a result, he will likely be more toward the back unless he gets up really early (highly unlikely), and that means he’s going to need a large-print, creative acronym sign in order to leave his mark on a national TV audience.… Read the rest