I Pray For John Parker Wilson

I’ve written several times about the curious intersection between football and religion, here, here, here, and most recently, here.

And now some more grist for the mill.

I just want to know: Was that sign put up before or after the Gator loss to Ole Miss?

Seriously, though, Jesus admonished us to not pray on the street corners. Does a Church of Christ marquee sign count? Yeah, Tim, get us a win every week and don’t let Jesus (and us) down while you’re at it. Nah, that’s not pressure.

Speaking of Churches of Christ, Nashville has one on just about every street corner. But since when did the football faithful gather at Vanderbilt’s Dudley Field for EPSN Gameday? Is this some kind of sign of the end times in Revelation that I somehow missed? Well, suffice it to day, good luck to both the ‘Dores and Auburn.

Heh.

If football is some sort of quasi-religion in the South (and all the available evidence strongly suggests that it is), then the kind that Bama’s been preaching so far this year could only be described as that Old Timey Smashmouth Football. The Tide’s big behemoths have controlled the O-line, allowing running backs like Glenn Coffee and Mark Ingram to gallop north-south at will, carrying the Good News of Bama’s resurgence to the downtrodden and the put-upon like a country preacher on horseback.

Is it 1961 again? No, it’s the dawning of the Age of Saban.

But what about offensive guru’s Jim McElwain’s conference-leading attack? Surely that must be one of those fancy-schmanzy “high church” sort of things, right?

Think again. Just listen to St. Nick talk about how he and McElwain have handled QB John Parker Wilson:

“The other thing that I liked (about McElwain’s philosophy), you have several different ways you can throw the ball. I thought, with our particular quarterback, there had to be some just reaction throws. It had to be more Dick and Jane rather than War and Peace. Simple. I felt like, even though our guy is bright and can handle all that, it just was making his position harder to play than it needed to be sometimes. We needed to simplify so that he could make better decisions.”

See Bama run. See Bama pass. See Bama Roll. Roll Tide, Roll!

Brilliant!

Still, a post-Dawg letdown against the Wildcat concerns me. I think I’ll say a little prayer for John Parker Wilson–just in case.

9 Comments

  1. That Girl

    Could ya send one up for Kodi Burns?

  2. Mike the Eyeguy

    Just Kodi, or are there any other Auburn QBs you want me to pray for?

  3. JRB

    (sitting silently, tapping his foot, folding sweaty hands together on his lap, jittery, confident, quiet before kickoff)

  4. Mike the Eyeguy

    Shall we all pray for JRB?

  5. Mike the Eyeguy

    Hey, that reminds me. You ever wonder what would happen if, when the guy up front says, “Shall we pray?” someone were to shout from the back, “No!”

    I mean, does he really want to know the answer to that question? For me, it often depends who’s doing the asking. Is he likely to be “short and sweet,” or am I going to get a 15-minute discourse?

  6. mmlace

    LOL at the thought of someone yelling “No!” from the back, Dr. Eyeguy!!!

    Are you that kinda person? Is that like something you might do? Are you that guy???

    Well while you’re busy praying, you could always feel free to offer one up for my Hawgs…who will be facing FL this week. Lord knows they need all the prayer they can get this season!

  7. Mike the Eyeguy

    Not as long as Eyegal and her sharp elbow are around…

    I’m afraid your Hawgs don’t have a chance if the Church of Christ is already praying for Tebow!

  8. Mike the Eyeguy

    Okay then, we needed that little prayer. Well, you’ve got to be able to win the ugly ones too, and we managed to get it done.

    I’ll leave it to JRB to comment on Vandy’s win over Aubie…

  9. JRB

    (whistling down the street, clicks his heels together, smiles)

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