Tunnel Vision, Man

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The following conversation recently took place in a local health care provider’s office. All names have been deleted in order to protect confidentiality and the sacred bong bond between doctor and patient:

Patient (hereafter referred to as “P”): “Doc, I’ve been havin’ these spells of tunnel vision, man.”

Doctor (hereafter referred to as “D”): “In one eye or both eyes?”

P: “Both.”

D: “How long has this been going on?”

P: “Oh, at least 5 or 6 years.” (translation: So long that he can’t really remember)

D: “How often does this happen?”

P: “Um, hard to say, pretty often I guess.”… Read the rest

The Dreaded “G”

I have come to the point where I question the validity of online quizzes, inventories and assessments. Why you ask?

Because of this:

Free Online Dating

This is the so-called “rating” that Ocular Fusion received when I visited the site “What’s My Blog Rated?”

That’s right, after nearly two years of edgy, envelope-pushing, controversial-topic-broaching, blood-pressure-popping blogging, all I get is the “Dreaded ‘G.'” I thought for sure I would get at least a PG, maybe even a PG-13 what with an entire category devoted to the topic of “Sex” and all. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would merit the money-making “R,” but a “G?”… Read the rest

E. Coli Anyone?

One of my favorite restaurants in Huntsville, Little Rosie’s Taqueria, is in a bit of hot water over the largest outbreak of E. coli poisoning in Alabama in over 20 years. Or maybe they should have used more hot water, I’m not sure.

We eat at this place a lot, so I’m not sure how we managed to dodge this particular bullet. Of course, the lawyers are closely monitoring the situation (thank God!), and health inspectors are reassuring everyone that this was an isolated incident and that in fact Little Rosie’s, in the wake of this, is probably the safest place to eat in Huntsville.… Read the rest

So Go Ahead. Woo Me

Gender bending is something that we don’t even talk about in the Deep South much less practice, so you can imagine how my eyes bugged out when I read this. Apparently, the rest of the country may not be ready to talk about it either.

I’ve always suspected that Hillary had a pair of big brass ones (metaphorically speaking, of course) and that Obama, with those lithe fingers and fine threads, was the embodiment of the modern metrosexual man. Now I have confirmation.

By the way, I would like to announce to the stable of Presidential candidates out there that my vote is officially up for grabs.… Read the rest

Let’s Hear It For The Little Guy

Among all the things that Pope Benedict XVI has stated recently, it’s important to remember one thing that he did not say: that those believers outside the Roman Catholic Church are not true Christians.

And I don’t believe that he would say that, because that’s not the official teaching of the Catholic Church (although there are many Catholics still today who might say that). What he did say is that those “ecclesial communities” formed by those other Christians are not churches in the “proper sense” because they do not have apostolic succession and are therefore “defective.” That has always been the view of the Catholic Church and the Pope is, for whatever reasons, basically stating what has always been official teaching.… Read the rest

Primum non nocere

Several have weighed in on the troubling irony that a physician, a member of the health professions sworn to protect the well-being of others, could also moonlight as a terrorist. Here’s a sample, from the ironically cynical, to the psychological analysis, to the grinding of the usual axe.

Primum non nocere— “First do no harm.” Yes, physicians should know better. But since when did the depths of the human condition not cut across professional lines?

… Read the rest

Interesting Religious Reads

USA Today starts the week off with two interesting religious reads.

First, a report on the growing New Sanctuary Movement, a coalition of houses of worship which is providing shelter and protection to illegal immigrants.

Second, it seems at least some boomer offspring are outdoing their parents when it comes to faith and fervor.

I find the notion that sacred space might still exist and that it might be recognized by civil authorities in this post-everything world intriguing. During the Civil War, Union cavalry soldiers commandeered local Huntsville churches to serve as stables and barracks.

Well, except for one. Above the front door of the Episcopal Church of the Nativity is a marble inscription–“Reverence My Sanctuary”–taken from Leviticus 26:2.… Read the rest

Carpe Diem!

Like me, Alberto Salazar has been running most of his life (albeit considerably faster). But that blasted Reaper is still nipping at his heels.

I’ve told Eyegal that if I go out running, to please tell everyone I went out the way I wanted to. Not exactly a chariot of fire, but a fine ride nonetheless.

These days, I wear a RoadID during my workouts. Following all the identifying information is the following short, but important, message:

Carpe Diem!

… Read the rest

Beware: Another Soccer Post Coming

We may have layed an egg at Copa with our inexperienced crew, but our U-20s are making some noise north of the border at the more junior World Cup.

Here’s some video of our 6-1 trouncing of Poland, including Adu’s neat hat trick.

Next up: USA v. Brazil. Adu v. Pato–should be a good one.

UPDATE 7/7: USA 2 Brazil 1! The U-20 Stars and Stripes book passage to the Round of 16, and Brazil, well, they’ll just have to wait and see if they advance. The lethal combination of Adu to Altidore did the damage up top, and US keeper Chris Seitz had a magnificent match, deflecting and/or smothering a barrage of dangerous opportunities.… Read the rest

That’s Why They Call It “Practice”

student_doctors.jpgEverybody would like to think that their doctor has always been faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive and able to diagnose and treat rare and exotic diseases in a single touch of a stethoscope. Nobody likes to think that their doctor may have actually been at one point a bumbling Barney Fife in a white coat.

But as this amusing and poignant view of early clinical training shows, chances are, they probably were. After all, that’s why they call it “practice.” My question is: why do they continue to call it that even after you graduate?… Read the rest

Be Careful What You Pray For

He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

–Matthew 5:45

Some of you may not know this, but Alabama Governor Bob Riley proclaimed this week “Days of Prayer for Rain” and asked all citizens to pray both individually and in their houses of worship for our drought to end. The predictable peals of derisive laughter came from the usual suspects, but it was business as usual in the Bible Belt.

According to yesterday’s Huntsville Times, it worked! Well, sorta.

I chuckled when I saw the headline and thought of that movie Bruce Almighty in which people prayed for things that they wanted or thought they needed, but the answers to their prayers often had unforeseen consequences.… Read the rest